I am hearing everyone pitching "How to Overcome Your Fears" or "Conquer the Unknown" and a host of other self-help titles around fear. Here's the thing (I'm going piss off some folks in my field with this) You can not make fear disappear. And, the likelihood of you going at it alone and making that fear your bitch it damn hard- at best.
To add insult to injury, when you check these folks out who want you to shell out a shit ton of cash for their 12 Steps to Fearless Freedom, it turns out to be the slimy guy that you saw last weekend at the car dealership. Or they are the wife living in California who has always lived in the land of Suburbia and hasn't lived much of life or even gets what living really is anyhow.
Short and sweet- the fear is not going anywhere. Deal with it. You can quiver in the corner and go on to some pity party but that is not going to get you anywhere. You want to achieve something but you are scared? Suck it up. You're afraid of looking dumb? Well, you might. And you may still end up doing amazing shit while being absofuckinglutely brilliant, but looking dumb, in the process.
Here's the deal: Our world is in a heap of trouble. Whether your sights are on your hyperlocal community, your hometown, national education issues, The Detroit Renaissance, Haiti, Egypt, or where ever, things are not going to shift by all of us getting stopped by our fear. Your fear is not going anywhere. So fuque it. You can go and do what you need to do and come back to handle it later.
Oh wait. You mean, after you stopped letting it stop you then it headed for the hills by the time that you come back for it? Look again. The fear is still there. It is just choosing to go by a different name. Or it could be the same name but is now in a different area of your life. See- it's not going anywhere. And those of us that move around in life as though fear is never present? Oh it's there alright. We just say "Fear? Fuque it!" because we have other things to do.
*As I write this my life is turning upside down and is filled to the gills with uncertainty. I am relocating after my husband and I have chosen to separate, my teenager is beyond pissed at the thought of changing schools, and I am in the position of make it or break it with my business. Every time that I have needed to deal with my fears, I have just done whatever there was to do. So here it is again- scared as hell and looking for what there is to do to have a life and business that I am head over heels, completely mad about! And you bet your sweet ass I have a coach- I don't have time to get stopped.
Sneak Peak: Handle Yo Bidness
Handle Yo Bidness is a series of four workshops that are live and in person. No teleseminars, no webcasts. They are intimate conversations that are real.
1. Make Your Inner Bitch Your Bitch*- You don't have to listen to her anymore when she tells you that you suck and you are going to fail anyhow. *not limited to women.
2. Tell Me Whatchu Want, Whatchu Really Really Want- No more "I don't know" Know what you ACTUALLY want to be/feel/have
3. Boundaries: Use 'Em or Lose 'Em- Getting clear about what you are willing to do and what you will tolerate
4. Put Up or Shut Up- Finding that illusive time for what you actually care about. The Un-Corporate version of time management.
The series will be rolling out in the Seattle Metro area in the very near future. Not in Seattle? Don't worry- working on a travel edition of it. Sign up below if you would like more information sent to you when the venue and dates are available or if you have other questions.
The most subversive protest of all: An Egyptian protestor kisses a riot police officer.
It is a crazy day in the world today. I am very present to the situation in Egypt today and it is running through the back of my mind. First, understand that I am not a political person. I actually go against the traditional political views- ok so I go against most traditional views period. But with today…
People are dying so that they have freedom of speech- freedom to express themselves. The current Egyptian government has restricted social media, cell phones, and then the internet all together. The government is using live ammunition on the protesters. One was even shot just for picking up a rock. Yet the people are committed to still getting out to the world what the hell is going on there. Others around the world are finding workarounds for them to still get the word out. They believe that what they have to say is so important that they are willing to die for it.
Not wanting to bring all of you guys down but rather to light a fire under your ass- what do you have to say? What is it within YOU that is worth dying for. Lemme let you in on a little something- NOT ONE OF YOU CAN ANSWER THAT WITH “NOTHING”.
What fires you up, what pisses you off? What if you weren’t trying to look cool, what is there for you? For everyone it is different. Maybe it is spreading goodness in the world and bringing people together for a fabulous meal that feeds their soul. Maybe it is something truly big that will impact folks around the globe. Whatever it is, start your legacy now. That thing that has been calling you- you really should have started on it last year. Since we can’t go back in time, tomorrow will have to suffice.
Don’t be afraid to piss some people off. It will happen. You are likely already pissing people off but they just aren’t telling you. And, since you are just sorta expressing what is important- what there is for you, you are half assed pissing them off because you are being half assed in your sharing.
If you are to really be living your best life, you will completely inspire people to the point of bringing them to tears AND you will piss them off to the point that they do not talk to you any longer.
What lights me up? For me, it is being a catalyst for you; provoking people to question the current models of how something is ‘supposed’ to get done and finding their own way and singing with their own voice. I get lit up when you get to be fully self expressed and doing something that supports others- which is why if you are in business to only make money, I will not work with you.
Now what pisses me off like no manana? When people don’t get to be who they really are- when their possibility, potential, pilot light, whatever you wanna call it get extinguished. That could be when there are atrocities involving children, people being killed when they are standing up for their rights as human beings, women being silence by not allowing them to obtain an education, and someone not stepping into their greatness.
So for this weekend, please do not allow this to bring you down or keep you from living your best this weekend. Instead, allow it to spring board you into what you living your best looks like-that which you get to contribute to others while being fully, completely, irrevocably lit up like the Fourth of July!
That thing that has been calling you- you really should have started on it last year. Since we can’t go back in time, tomorrow will have to suffice. And that fear that has held you back thus far, push on anyway- give 'em something to talk about. You have a legacy to start working on.